Steven Moffat, the man with the direct line to your childhood nightmares, has created some of the most memorable Doctor Who antagonists during his tenure. He’s brought us Headless Monks, rotating-faced Winders, sexy vampire fish… he’s even taught us to be wary of black cubes. Is there no end to the man’s creepy creativity? God, we hope not.
Last month CultBox asked you to vote for your favourite Moffat monster (or ‘Moffster’. No… no, we’re never saying that again…), and then we wiped your mind straight after so that we didn’t have to kill the Star Whale. You watched! You voted! You’ve only got yourselves to blame if you don’t like the results…
10. Prisoner Zero
Aww, c’mon! No love for the weird morphing intergalactic angler fish who basically sums up more than 2 years of Moffat plot lines in just one cryptic warning? For shame, people. Just because it hasn’t quite got the mouths figured out.
9. Peg Dolls
Big heads, unsettling giggling, and the ability to turn you into one of their demented whittled ranks; the Peg Dolls are the scariest things to come out of a toy cupboard since the Cabbage Patch Kid craze.
Like all the best frightening things, they’re scary because they’re a familiar thing twisted into something uncanny and dangerous.
8. The Flesh
They’re you, but in goo. It’s surprising so few found The Flesh a good monster, but then what do you have in mind when you think of The Flesh?
Ganger folk who look like a hungover version of you? A cauldron of suspiciously active opalescent porridge? A weird gloopy-monster-lady? Perhaps it’s because they’re so hard to pin down that they didn’t rank higher.
Star Trek has them by the bucketload, but in our opinion there aren’t enough malevolent baritone-voiced gas monsters in Doctor Who.
Having hosted more Time Lords than a Gallifreyan Come Dine With Me, House (voiced by Michael Sheen) has got ‘evil entity’ down to a fine art, and becomes all the more scary when he turns the familiar TARDIS into his own rat maze.
6. The Gunslinger
He might look like a Westworld reject, but The Gunslinger is basically Frankenstein’s Monster in a Stetson… and with a whopping great cannon strapped to his arm. How cool’s that?
Plus he’s exactly the sort of character you can imagine Moffat bringing back as heavy arsenal should The Doctor ever have another Demon’s Run situation on his hands.
5. Minotaur Creature
A distant cousin of the papier-mâché headed bull-folk, the Nimon (see ‘Horns of the Nimon’), the Minotaur thuds around menacingly, giving the worst room service this side of [REDACTED].
What makes it a refreshingly scary foe is that, unlike a lot of Doctor Who monsters, it’s primal, unceasing, and can’t be slowed down by a quick burst of linguistic flailing from The Doctor.
4. The Snowmen
Was it a traumatic childhood experience while watching Channel 4’s The Snowman? Or the fact that the Christmas Special was barely two months ago?
Either way, a good deal of you think Sir Ian McKellen’s icy army are one of The Moff’s top monsters. And actually, there’s good reason. For a start, just their whole modus operandi is cool: carnivorous psychic snow(!). There’s also the fact they’re one of the few Doctor Who monsters to properly kill a companion stone dead. Brrr!
3. The Dream Lord
A sort of somnambulists’s Valeyard, the Dream Lord has the makings of a great recurring villain, because he’s tied directly to The Doctor’s darkest fears.
And while there are no boundaries as to the Dream Lord’s appearance, we’d be sad if he returned and wasn’t played by the criminally under-appreciated Toby Jones, who brought a great oiliness to the role of what essentially was the ‘Anti-Doctor’.
2. The Silence
The who? Oh, yes, sorry – looked away there for a second. From their Munch-inspired look to their sinister anti-mnemonic power, The Silence are iconic villains. And most tantalisingly of all, their ‘forget-me-now’ ability means the Doctor could have encountered them hundreds of times across his regenerations and never known it.
Why, one could be looking at you right now as you read this, and you wouldn’t even be aware…
1. The Weeping Angels
Almost 60% of you voted for The Weeping Angels as your favourite Moffat monster, and it’s not hard to see why. They’re the ultimate predators, because our weakness is their strength.
Only deadly when we look away from them, the quantum-locked creatures strike at the quivering nerve of our most base evolutionary traits. It’s a power that lends itself nicely to well-edited shocks and frights in the show, and in the real world makes for a great cheap game to keep the kids entertained: just sit them in front of any statue in the park and tell them not to blink. Hours of fun!
Who’s your favourite villain or monster from the Steven Moffat era so far? Let us know below…